Exs Wanting To Be Facebook Friends

Well, Damn!

How dare you send me a freakin passive aggressive “friend request” on fuckin’ Facebook. You wanna be my friend? Really?! You weaselly asshole!

You didn’t seem to give a good Goddamn or a single solitary fuck about what happen to me after you unceremoniously dumped me after months of a relationship and after you watched me cook your ass dinner. Your actions were unwarranted, unfair, unkind, thoughtless and terrible. Those are some great friend qualities, prick.

Sure, a few months ago, I was pleasant when you popped up on my Yahoo IM, with a ‘hey! how ya been’ nearly a year after the fact. And yes, I wanted to know What-the-Fuck and grill your ass like a summer BBQ but I didn’t. By the way, thanks for that mindfuck in the middle of my day. Given your past scumbag actions it wasn’t the biggest surprise that you dis-fuckin-appeared after said chat. Douche!

As a grown ass woman I understand the answer doesn’t change the fact we are not together. And I can move forward, happy in the knowledge I’ve haven’t seen your damn lame ass since and probably wouldn’t, until now.

A Facebook request? This, you fuckwit, is too much.

Guess what? Mr. **** *** ******, mutha fucka. I’ll click ‘accept’ rather than ‘ignore’ for your sorry ass “friend” request if only to write this on your glorious Wall:

Fuck Right The Hell Off You Godamn Soulless Triffilin’-ass Bastard.

Then delete you.

(Exs Wanting to be Facebook Friends)

Published in: on 10/28/2009 at 17:00  Comments (2)  
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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. So glad to have been a co-hort in this creation.

  2. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamen.

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